"I'm Captain Kirk!"

"I'm Captain Kirk!"

Nov 20

I <3 you, YouTube. Gimme a kiss.

Marvel: Hire Alan Moore

Marvel: Hire Alan Moore

Nov 19

I would like to sketch for you now a brief fantasy. I recognize from the outset that this fantasy probably has little to no realistic chance of actually happening. I expect the comments to be full of reasons why it cannot happen.

Still, a sketch, if you please.

Marvel should hire Alan Moore before Watchmen comes out next March.

Petty Bitchery: Trek Trailer Blues

Petty Bitchery: Trek Trailer Blues

Nov 17

OK. So when it comes to Nerdiquette…y’all know that I generally try to be part of the solution, rather than the problem. I want to be a geek who does not conform to the Mundanes’ general perception of stereotypical geek behavior. I try to use “actually” sparingly. I try not to force people to read/watch/consume shit they won’t really like, even if I think it is TEH AWESOME, WOOT! And I really try not to whine incessantly about stuff I think I am somehow entitled to just because I’m a fan.

Right now, however, I’m about to go all nerd stereotype BITCH ATTACK on your virtual ass…because I still haven’t seen the Star Trek trailer. And do you know why? Because I went to Quantum of Solace on Saturday fully prepared for said trailer — I refused to watch the bootleg Matt posted below, because I wanted to see it on the big screen — and then THEY DIDN’T SHOW IT.

DOUBLE-U TEE EFF AMC!

They showed that fucking Will Smith trailer twice. I don’t care what the pseudo-mysterious “seven pounds” refers to! I don’t care if this is Oscar bait or just one of those “gritty” thrillers where no one wears make-up! I want Spock! Pointy ears on the big fucking screen!

The excitement evaporated from my entire form after that. I slumped over in my seat and kept dozing off…and I liked the movie! It was good! There was a lot of awesome in there! But I was so, so deflated. It’s like I just gave up.

So now the official trailer is out online, but I don’t want to watch that, either. Because I am owed. I am owed a Star Trek trailer on the big screen and I refuse to watch it on the little bitty one until I get it! Rargh, smash, angry sounds!!!

I already hate myself for writing this. It stoops to a level of petty bitchery that I thought I had banished from my geekly soul (well, maybe not when it comes Phoenix/Cyclops stuff. But I’m allowed That One Thing, remember). In the end, I am no better than the constant complainers in our fandom, the “actually”-bots, the self-entitled Comic Book Guys (and Girls). A disturbing revelation, but one that I probably just need to accept. (Angry, time-wasting letter to you, AMC!)

New Trek Trailer (Bootleg)…Finally.

New Trek Trailer (Bootleg)…Finally.

Nov 15

My Twitter pals (holla) know that yesterday I was rabidly scouring the intertubes for a bootleg version of the new Star Trek trailer. At 5 p.m. I finally gave up, and it kinda pissed me off. How could it take a planet full of well-meaning nerds more than 12 hours to upload a shaky cameraphone vid of a highly anticipated trailer?! What’s everyone’s problem, anyway, and why don’t you all understand MY needs? Am I the asshole here? (callback)

Anyway. I found it.

On Vomiting Blood and Invading Secretly

On Vomiting Blood and Invading Secretly

Nov 13

I get my comics sent in boxes several weeks after their release, so I always feel too far behind to even write reviews or comments. Plus, it’s almost always an exercise in pleasing myself, since there are far more people with far more time and focus than I who do a far better job of reviewing comics than I do.

Still, if just for my own edification, a few random thoughts on things I read recently.

Everybody has their own internal barometer for these sort of things, but I think the Final Crisis: Rage of the Red Lanterns one-shot represents at least a minor breaking point in my relationship with the DC Universe.

In case you missed this scintillating issue, it features a new corps of lanterns fueled by rage, and for some reason as part of using their powers, they vomit blood.

That’s right. Geoff Johns, who can be a damn decent writer when he wants to be, indulges in the logical extension of his obsession with gore and violence by creating an entire army of villains who all VOMIT BLOOD.

“Nasty” is about the only word that comes to mind, and it points out quite clearly that for the most part, modern superhero comics and myself are moving in different directions lately.

Wondering where the story went in Secret Invasion? It’s moved to Avengers: The Initiative. Their tie-in storyline about a band of low-level heroes teleporting across the country to kill sleeper cell agents reads like the ACTUAL story of how the war between humanity and the Skrulls happens. It’s everything that’s been missing from the core miniseries–y’know, like actual INVASION and BATTLE and stuff.

That’s actually all I got.