Petty Bitchery: Trek Trailer Blues
Nov 17OK. So when it comes to Nerdiquette…y’all know that I generally try to be part of the solution, rather than the problem. I want to be a geek who does not conform to the Mundanes’ general perception of stereotypical geek behavior. I try to use “actually” sparingly. I try not to force people to read/watch/consume shit they won’t really like, even if I think it is TEH AWESOME, WOOT! And I really try not to whine incessantly about stuff I think I am somehow entitled to just because I’m a fan.
Right now, however, I’m about to go all nerd stereotype BITCH ATTACK on your virtual ass…because I still haven’t seen the Star Trek trailer. And do you know why? Because I went to Quantum of Solace on Saturday fully prepared for said trailer — I refused to watch the bootleg Matt posted below, because I wanted to see it on the big screen — and then THEY DIDN’T SHOW IT.
DOUBLE-U TEE EFF AMC!
They showed that fucking Will Smith trailer twice. I don’t care what the pseudo-mysterious “seven pounds” refers to! I don’t care if this is Oscar bait or just one of those “gritty” thrillers where no one wears make-up! I want Spock! Pointy ears on the big fucking screen!
The excitement evaporated from my entire form after that. I slumped over in my seat and kept dozing off…and I liked the movie! It was good! There was a lot of awesome in there! But I was so, so deflated. It’s like I just gave up.
So now the official trailer is out online, but I don’t want to watch that, either. Because I am owed. I am owed a Star Trek trailer on the big screen and I refuse to watch it on the little bitty one until I get it! Rargh, smash, angry sounds!!!
I already hate myself for writing this. It stoops to a level of petty bitchery that I thought I had banished from my geekly soul (well, maybe not when it comes Phoenix/Cyclops stuff. But I’m allowed That One Thing, remember). In the end, I am no better than the constant complainers in our fandom, the “actually”-bots, the self-entitled Comic Book Guys (and Girls). A disturbing revelation, but one that I probably just need to accept. (Angry, time-wasting letter to you, AMC!)
New Trek Trailer (Bootleg)…Finally.
Nov 15My Twitter pals (holla) know that yesterday I was rabidly scouring the intertubes for a bootleg version of the new Star Trek trailer. At 5 p.m. I finally gave up, and it kinda pissed me off. How could it take a planet full of well-meaning nerds more than 12 hours to upload a shaky cameraphone vid of a highly anticipated trailer?! What’s everyone’s problem, anyway, and why don’t you all understand MY needs? Am I the asshole here? (callback)
Anyway. I found it.
On Vomiting Blood and Invading Secretly
Nov 13I get my comics sent in boxes several weeks after their release, so I always feel too far behind to even write reviews or comments. Plus, it’s almost always an exercise in pleasing myself, since there are far more people with far more time and focus than I who do a far better job of reviewing comics than I do.
Still, if just for my own edification, a few random thoughts on things I read recently.
Everybody has their own internal barometer for these sort of things, but I think the Final Crisis: Rage of the Red Lanterns one-shot represents at least a minor breaking point in my relationship with the DC Universe.
In case you missed this scintillating issue, it features a new corps of lanterns fueled by rage, and for some reason as part of using their powers, they vomit blood.
That’s right. Geoff Johns, who can be a damn decent writer when he wants to be, indulges in the logical extension of his obsession with gore and violence by creating an entire army of villains who all VOMIT BLOOD.
“Nasty” is about the only word that comes to mind, and it points out quite clearly that for the most part, modern superhero comics and myself are moving in different directions lately.
Wondering where the story went in Secret Invasion? It’s moved to Avengers: The Initiative. Their tie-in storyline about a band of low-level heroes teleporting across the country to kill sleeper cell agents reads like the ACTUAL story of how the war between humanity and the Skrulls happens. It’s everything that’s been missing from the core miniseries–y’know, like actual INVASION and BATTLE and stuff.
That’s actually all I got.
Ida Says HEY
Nov 11You all know how I feel about The Middleman. Many of you also know how I feel about approaching nerdlebrities in the wild. Could it be that these two topics are about to meet in the most satisfying of ways? Read on!
A couple weeks ago, I spotted Mary Pat Gleason at a screening. Definitely, definitely her. If you haven’t seen The Middleman, she plays the delightfully cranky android Ida — a formidable foil for Wendy Watson.
She asked me if that was my coat on that seat over there, was I saving it for someone? Oh, um…what? No! All yours, Mary Pat Gleason! At the time, I was Twittering away on my phone, refreshing relentlessly and following a scintillating debate between Kim and Caroline about the merits of Jean Grey. I giddily posted an updated about “the HEYDAR” being in the same room as me…should I go talk to her? Kim helpfully reminded me that Ida is not actually the HEYDAR, but operates the HEYDAR, and I should absolutely go talk to her!
I don’t think I would have done it, were it not for this bit of Twit-encouragement.
Anyway, after the movie, I was standing out in the lobby and saw her exiting the bathroom. I darted after her, tapped her on the shoulder and said something like, “Excuse me, I just wanted to tell you that I love you on The Middleman!”
“Oh!” she said. “I loved working on that show and I love you for saying that!”
I noted the troubling past tense in the first love declaration. “Is it…is it coming back?” I asked hopefully.
“We don’t think so,” she said.
I must have looked rather instantly devastated. “I know,” she said, patting my arm comfortingly. “I’m sad, too.”
Apparently, there is hope, but it sounds like the thin, desperate kind of hope that drives some people to spend the rest of their lives writing steamy, slashy series finale fanfic, all in the name of gaining closure on the likes of Wendy Watson and Co.
Dollhouse: Probably DOA
Nov 06Herc over at Ain’t It Cool has what can only be called the pre-mortem post-mortem on Joss Whedon’s Dollhouse, which has already been doomed to certain failure by a Friday night time slot, the same night where Firefly rotted and died a quick death.
X-Files was the first thing I thought of too, and Herc has the date–1993. Do the shitholes at Fox seriously think they can turn Friday into some kind of sci-fi night again in the tradition of a move they made fifteen years ago? A move that has meaning only to about twenty people, most of which work for Fox? It’s not like when NBC owned sitcoms on Thursday; no one reminisces about “Must-See Friday” over on Fox when Mulder and Scully ruled the roost.
I can’t honestly believe that Fox wants Dollhouse to fail; I just don’t think they give a shit either way. What they probably hope for is another Firefly–drop a little cash on a token first half-season, sell a shitload of DVDs, make a cheap feature film that will probably make its money back and maybe a little profit, sell some comic books and toys and T-shirts to the nerds.
