The 50 Things That No Great Comics Collection Needs To Have

The 50 Things That No Great Comics Collection Needs To Have

Sep 29

Inspired by Tom Spurgeon, my own public service.

1. Lady Death
2. Chuck Austen
3. Brute Force

4. Milo Ventimiglia
5. Water damage
6. Psycho Pirate getting his eyes poked out
7. Three copies of Watchmen
8. CGC
9. The cast of Guiding Light

10. Polybags
11. Alan Moore’s WildCATS
12. Shitty minicomics
13. Power Girl’s rack
14. Alf
15. Film adaptations
16. Film adaptations of movies based on comic books
17. Mold
18. Liefeld

19. James Robinson’s WildCATS
20. The death of Justice League Europe
21. Nancy Reagan
22. Male superheroes becoming females briefly
23. The Beyonder’s hair circa Secret Wars II

24. Dust mites
25. Silverblade
26. Collectible trading cards
27. Ed Benes
28. Magical marriage retcons
29. Ass shots (see #27)
30. Henry Kissinger
31. A collection of webcomics printed off your computer on a dot-matrix
32. Nicholas Cage
33. Archie
34. Jason Todd…alive
35. Grant Morrison’s WildCATS
36. Anybody’s WildCATS (okay, maybe Joe Casey’s)
37. Mara Jade
38. Foil covers

39. Wonder Dog eating Marvin
40. Postcard inserts inviting you to get more information about the Navy
41. Danity Kane
42. Bloodwynd
43. Sagas involving clones
44. Harley Quinn
45. Freddy Krueger
46. Al Bundy

47. Cockroaches
48. Simon Cowell
49. Anything co-written by William Shatner
50. A blog

7 comments

  1. I’m comforted by the fact that my collection only contains 31 of those.

  2. Jason, let it be clear: I live in no glass house. My collection contains 13 of them.

    I will be burning my collection tonight for warmth and light to save money on my electric bill.

  3. 19 for me, that I know of.

  4. I’ve been ripping mine up and shoving it into the walls to serve as insulation.

    An truthfully, I’m amazed that I only have 31 of those things, I bought a lot of crap in the 80’s and early 90’s.

    That said, the death of the JLE is totally defendable, since it happened in an issue of Starman.

  5. No Danity Kane? Are you sure?!?

    (p.s. — you’re funny.)

  6. NO Danity Kane.

    I will, however, allow Donny Klang.

  7. Chris

    AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGH!

    I just replied. A sizable reply. I found time to make a reply.

    And it didn’t post.

    Thanks for giving the day a special extra twist, WordPress.

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