Hawkman: Shit-Kicking Outer Space Redneck
Aug 15This is my just-in-time entry to pal Jeff’s First Inaugural Hawkman Pitch Contest. You may have seen we have our own pitch contest going right now, The Shitty Watchmen Sequel Contest. I’d plug it but frankly our prizes suck compared to original art, so pal Jeff has pretty much stolen our thunder. As he should. He is thunderous.
And so, the pitch…best of luck to all.
Let’s start with a basic rundown of what makes Hawkman worth keeping around:
1) He’s a cool-looking dude with wings.
2) He carries a bad-ass mace.
3) His vibe is that he’s this tight-ass warrior dude who doesn’t have time for pointless rhetoric like Green Arrow’s lefty leanings. Beat downs now, ask questions later.
In short, he’s kind of an otherworldly redneck–the Ted Nugent of superheroes.
Let’s run with that, shall we?
My Pal, The Comic Shop Guy
Aug 13
Comics blogger and underground murder cult leader Kevin Church has kicked up a kerfuffle with his post criticizing a comic shop’s e-mail newsletter for suggesting in a review that their customers “Not Buy” an upcoming issue of Astonishing X-Men.
Not buy. A retailer, in his newsletter to customers, is telling people to not buy a comic book before it hits stands. He’s telling them in advance that he doesn’t think they should spend their money at his shop, on this comic. This is the stupidest goddamn thing I’ve seen lately from an industry plagued with stupid goddamn things. I don’t want my bartender telling me that I’m drinking the wrong damn thing; I don’t want the clerk at the record store giving me shit because I’m buying some motherfucking Yanni; and I don’t want the guy who’s selling me my weekly comics fix to tell me to not buy a fucking X-Men comic.
I tend to wholeheartedly agree, as have others, but the comments thread has featured some guest appearances by folks who seem to think the “Not Buy” suggestion somehow actually makes GOOD BUSINESS SENSE.
Their argument seems to boil down to, “A negative review makes me trust my comic shop guy/gal more,” which of course leaves aside that from a marketing perspective, providing negative reviews of anything to your customer base makes no sense fundamentally, compared to providing positive reviews of stuff they may like, explaining WHY they may like it. For some reason, these forms of positive heads-up are dismissed out of hand as being too much like “marketing,” which YEP, they are, since that is marketing’s chief goal: TO SELL SHIT.
Anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about here; I’m more interested in the idea of “trusting” the person who sells me comics. Or more specifically, why?
Why do we need to like and trust the retailer who sells us comic books in the first place?
Heroes in Love
Aug 12It’s always sort of interesting when we nerds try to diagnose what, exactly, is going wrong with a certain TV show. The season unfolds, the wrongness unfolds, and we climb all over each other (and our piles of remotes and nachos) trying to say why. We usually get it almost right. Not entirely. But there are times when I think we really miss the mark, especially if we’re so focused on Why This is Not What I Want and begin every sentence with “they should…” (and end at least 3/4 of them with “pay me big stacks of money to tell them how to do this show because I know everything and people on the internet think I’m smart”). Like, remember when everyone tried to theorize about what was wrong with Alias at varying points in its tumultuous life? Too much Rambaldi, not enough Rambaldi. Too outlandish, not outlandish enough. Too complicated, too dumbed-down. Maybe the fucking problem was that J.J. Abrams got a bunch of stupid notes from the network that were just as confusing and contradictory as all the armchair criticism. You know?
All this is a lot of build-up to talk about the recent rumblings about romance on this season of Heroes. (Some potential SPOILERS in that link, FYI.)
Zot! Reviewed (aka Shameless Plugging)
Aug 11I’ve written a review of the new Zot! black and white collection over at Blogcritics.
Bat-Tunes: "Miranda" and More
Aug 08When I put the word “Batman” into my iTunes search box, 111 tracks come up.
Most of them are various soundtracks. A number of them are weirdo novelty songs. Several of them are quite entertaining, in a “holy crap they actually put this on record” kind of way.
As we’re currently still basking in another Summer of the Bat, I thought it might be fun to prowl through the virtual vinyl stacks of my external hard drive and offer a selection of…Bat-Tunes! I’ll probably try to do this a couple times, if I can remember, and carve time from my busy schedule of not doing anything truly productive or career-furthering with my valuable time.
