Star Whoring Gets Weird
May 11I blathered just a few days ago about the strangeness of the new “Han Shoots First” T-shirt from the online Star Wars store, considering that it’s Lucasfilm’s goddamned fault that Han DIDN’T shoot first in the SEs in the first place, and of course, the shirt’s already been done.
Now, another indicator of LFL’s undeserved “ironic” touch: A new ad I’ve spotted in a comic (and which I cannot find online DAMN YOU TO HELL STAR WARS NERDS GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER AND SCAN EVERYTHING AVAILABLE ON THE PLANET SO I CAN LINK IT WHEN I NEED TO) that basically says, “Hey, we know we’re just churning out figures for characters that spent three seconds on screen in the films. Ain’t it kewl?!”
Y’know, people buy figures, collect Star Wars shit, that’s fine. I used to do it myself. Go with God.
But isn’t it kind of a kick in the groin for Lucasfilm to essentially say in its advertising, “We’re bilking you for every penny we can get, and you let us, and we like it, so fuck you?” In other words, BUY this “wacky” T-shirt that basically advertises how you’ll be repurchasing films this fall that you’ve bought five times already. BUY this action figure of a guy in a rubber suit who spent three seconds onscreen in a movie that’s thirty years old, just because we made it, and just because you collect shit. BUY these five action figures and send away for this rare sixth figure of George Lucas, which we’re promoting as something clever and unique, even though we sold you the same goddamned thing four years ago and told you it was clever and unique back then.
Geeks can be suckers. I know, because I often am one myself. Just don’t rub my fucking nose in it.
52 Picks Up
May 10Jesus, there is only really ONE goddamned clever title to use with 52, and every fucker in the blogosphereoverse galactica is USING it.
A good interview with 52 editor Steven Wacker here.
Or, if you prefer, an irrefutable thesis on why Gambit sucks.
You wanna get high?
May 10Check out these trippy concept paintings of space communities from NASA circa the 1970s. Play William Shatner’s version of “Rocket Man” while you do.
E3 Blabbery: PS3 Is Pee
May 09Alert Nerd’s very own Chris is on the floor at E3 this year for work. My understanding is that he’s the voice actor for Waluigi, which is a far more lucrative career than you might imagine.
The rest of us are not on the floor. In fact, right now, I’m in a chair. That makes it easy to both sit and type at the same time.
This does not mean, however, that us non-floor-ites cannot sit up in our chairs and shout from the chairtops about the news dribbling like spittle out of this massive monument to consumer electronics lust. If the blogosphereoverse stands for anything, it stands for the right of every God-given American to shout from chairtops, even if no one listens.
Linkypoop
May 08Got my first issue of World Watch One in the mail, the official unofficial newsletter (well, one of them) for fans of Buckaroo Banzai. Lots of great stuff in it, but what YOU must concern yourself with is the upcoming Buckaroo Banzai comic book miniseries, which by all appearances will be cool.
Put your iPod into a boombox from the eighties. No SHIT. AWESOME. I’m not kidding.
A great article from Comics Should Be Good featuring some of comics’ greatest “magna opera.” In other words, all time classic runs by great artists and/or writers that have become definitive lifetime masterworks for the respective creators. Interesting topic, that. Here’s part two and part three.
I can die happy. Here are the characters from Battlestar Galactica drawn as if they were on The Simpsons.
Every day, the internet finds some new way to please me.
