Solicitations: DC, July
Apr 17So the DC Comics solicitations for comics shipping in July are out, and I must confess, I have become sadly obsessed with these monthly disclosures of minor tidbits of trivia, which I then gnaw upon in my brain until they grow into disfigured ideas of what could happen in future comic books.
That’s right. I regularly contemplate not the future of my life, or my career, or my unborn child. I think of the future of Batman, and Wonder Woman, and the rest.
So what does the future hold? Anything interesting? Let’s see…
SPOILERS AFTER THE JUMPITY JUMP.
Apocalypto Delayed
Apr 17Say what you will about Mel Gibson–he’s nothing if not an interesting filmmaker.
Unfortunately, we’re all gonna have to wait a bit longer to see his latest project, as Apocalypto has been bumped from early August to early December. Heavy rains in Mexico are to blame.
I’ve never seen Braveheart, never saw The Passion of the Christ, but I’m pretty psyched about this flick. The trailer is intriguing, and if nothing else, it could be a spectacularly riveting failure–a major studio big-budget motion picture shot in an ancient language starring unknowns. I’m fascinated already.
WikiWikiWhack: Mel Gibson, Apocalypto
EU: Pronounced "Ewww."
Apr 16I was so damned excited as a pathetic nerd boy for last year’s Star Wars: Episode III that I actually did something I never thought I’d ever do again: I read Star Wars fiction.
Do Not Ingest Stylus
Apr 15I love cautionary stick figure signs and decoding what they’re really trying to say (don’t Jazzercise on the subway! Watch out for stars coming out of your head when the vending machine falls on you!).
So naturally, I just spent a good 20 minutes howling over this Nintendo DS Lite and Japanese Manual Mini Review.
Look at the GIANT DS falling on the baby! The octopus! The pissed-off snowman!
WikiWikiWhack: Nintendo DS Lite
Shit I Don’t Get…
Apr 14…about Infinite Crisis.
1) This is basically a blowjob to the original Crisis, right? And to all the fanboys who love their multiverse and the Silver Age? Written and orchestrated by a cabal of slavish devotees to the Silver Age?
Then why is every character from the pre-Crisis and Crisis era such an asshole? Alex Luthor, Superboy Prime, Superman of Earth-2–they’re pricks, to a man.
2) What the hell do these people have against the Giffen/DeMatteis era Justice League? Blue Beetle gets his brains shot out, Maxwell Lord becomes a malevolent bastard, Fire gets bitchy (and soon will become a throat-slitting secret agent, in Greg Rucka’s Checkmate series), Booster Gold’s written as a moron. I half expect G’nort to be the manipulating force pulling Alex Luthor’s strings, and that he’ll reveal himself by taking a steamy dump on Oberon’s forehead.
3) A one-shot? Four lead-up miniseries? A seven-issue main series, an assload of crossovers, and four one-shot specials to follow up on the lead-up miniseries? Necessary? Really?
WikiWikiWhack: Infinite Crisis, Multiverse (DC Comics), G’nort
