Indiana Jones and the Whiny, Bitchy Billionaire

Indiana Jones and the Whiny, Bitchy Billionaire

Jan 03

I wasn’t gonna even link this, and I don’t have the energy or interest at this point to muster a robust and blustery “fuck you, Lucas” diatribe. (In fact, maybe I’ll make that a New Year’s resolution–no bitching about George Lucas.)

But, well, here: Vanity Fair has their cover story on Indy 4 up, and sure enough, Lucas finds time to complain about his “fans” yet again:

“The fans are all upset,” Lucas says. “They’re always going to be upset. ‘Why did he do it like this? And why didn’t he do it like this?’ They write their own movie, and then, if you don’t do their movie, they get upset about it. So you just have to stand by for the bricks and the custard pies, because they’re going to come flying your way.”

Listen, Georgie boy, lemme illuminate your brain pan on this: The fans are upset because you’ve spent billions of dollars to make two shitty movies and one not-quite-as-shitty movie over the past eight years. No one has any reason to suspect that this will be anything but an awful attempt to recapture the glory days of your maverick filmmaking youth. At this point, the mere mention of your name makes me cranky, and I’m sure I’m not the only person who feels that way.

So instead of bitching to Vanity Fair, why not go back and rewatch The Phantom Menace, and see if you don’t have a better idea why “the fans are upset.”

We’re upset because you SUCK, Lucas. You totally suck.

(and I already broke my New Year’s resolution, goddamnit)