A Perfect Sentence on Shark-Man
Jul 12“You hit a home run in the bottom of the ninth in the seventh game of the World Series to win the game for your team while eating Steak Diane and drinking Waikato Draught (the world’s best “regular†beer) or perhaps Wisconsin Belgian Red (the world’s best “specialty†beer) and as you round the bases, you happen to have sex with 1990-era Sherilyn Fenn and then you trip over the autobiography of Jesus as you round second base and then at third base your base coach tells you that you’re the first-born love child of Bill Gates and he wants to leave his entire fortune to you. That’s what reading three issues of Shark-Man is like. Only reading three issues of Shark-Man is even better.”
(Courtesy of Greg Burgas in his weekly review column for July 10 at Comics Should Be Good)
"Really? Yeah, really!"
Jul 11Holy crap, I think I’ve fallen off the reality show wagon hard. I just discovered I Survived a Japanese Game Show.
A whackload of Americans perform crazy Japanese game show stunts on a show called majide (j-youth slang for “really?” – the host and audience yells the tag phrase, “majide… hai, majide!” Literally, “Really? Yeah, really!” complete with odd hand motion and letter-M gang sign) The only downside is all the typical reality show, behind-the-scenes crap. It’s only a matter of time before someone says “I’m not here to make friends” ruins it all.
Why couldn’t we just have a show, exactly like this, without that shit. Most of it is coming from the site producers, and then played up in post anyhow. It’s not real.
But the hanging out in Japan… oh, and the picking up stuffed bears as a giant human claw machine game… that’s fucking real!
Also, watching the Japanese audience’s t-shirts is a drinking game waiting to happen. “I heart Guam!” “Oh Happy Day!” Every one of them a winner.
You Light Up My Ass
Jul 11The new monorails at Disneyland apparently place supercool blue LCD lighting right where it belongs–at ASS LEVEL.
(via MiceChat)
Comic-Con: Still For You?
Jul 10Just in case ya missed it: here’s a great PW article by Laura Hudson, all about the monster that Comic-Con has become.
This week, I’ve had at least three people ask me what my plans are for the con. My plans are…to not go and read all the coverage on the internet. OMG! they say. How can this be?!
Truth be told, the last CC I attended was in 2006, and I’ve had mixed feelings ever since. I do think it can still be a whole shitload o’ fun — my favorite day was Sunday, when I spent a few delightful hours roaming Artist’s Alley, chatting up creators and purchasing an embarrassingly large pile of stuff from Raina Telgemeier. But the sheer…crush of the crowd is still seared in my memory, particularly the slightly frightening 20 minutes wherein I was squashed in the middle of a sprawling pseudo-line waiting for the Battlestar Galactica panel, the burbling of two guys arguing about “Light Sith” uncomfortably close to my left ear. And I know this has been addressed a ton, and is sort of a tiresome, indie rock kid-type argument, but something about the near-complete mainstreamification of the whole thing does bother me. I kind of hate myself for that, but it does. There are real Hollywood parties. There are panels for stuff that you can’t even really stretch to call genre, like Dexter (I know there’s Julie Benz, but I don’t think there will ever be a Dexter storyline where she dies and then shows up in a crate and then gets pregnant with a demon spawn who will grow up to become Vincent Kartheiser. Not until season six, at least). It’s a pop culture con, not a nerd con. The people who used to make fun of it think it’s cool now. It throws my poor little brain for a bit of a loop.
And yet…and yet. Every time July rolls around, I still get a little bit of the urge. I remember how much fun it is to run into people, the weird conversations that occur when you mix your fellow exhausted con-goers with alcohol, the limited edition Castewar Bill Murray shirts that you can’t find anywhere else (still gots mine!). I remember all the “Only at Comic-Con” things I’ve witnessed, like Steven Horn’s Amazing Shark Suit…but that’s a story for another time.
Maybe I’ll go back next year. But I know it will require the following things: months of preparation (just to find lodging…oof), a slight attitude adjustment (OK, there are Hollywood parties, but no swag suites just yet, right?!), and the ability to power my way through the crowd with Buffy-esque agility (probably all I need is some leather pants!). I can do this. Maybe.
"Turn left… turn right… Turbo Boost… you are at your destination, Michael."
Jul 09I’m surprised nobody did this sooner – for years now we’ve had in-car GPS systems and they’ve been talking at you for awhile. So if your car is going to talk at you, why not make it sound like William Daniels? Mio Technology has invented what they’re calling “Navi-tainment”, which is a dorky way of saying “GPS guidance system that sounds like a TV show.” Still, you have to admit, the symmetry makes sense. Fictional talking car lends voice to real-world talking cars.
But why stop there? Here is Alert Nerd’s top 5 list of other robot voices they should license for GPS units;
5) Old school Cylon Centurion. Awesomely creepy way to get directions, but the “By Your Command.” every time you enter a destination will be worth the cost alone.
4) Dr. Theopolis. Twiki would have been cool, but Mel Blanc is dead. Eric Server isn’t. Hence…
3) C3-PO. I don’t know that I’d want it, but from a business standpoint, this is actually one I expect to see happen, particularly if the KITT version does decent. If they can sell a lightsaber remote, they can sell Anthony Daniels as a GPS.
2) Robby the Robot. Will only really work if it yells “Danger! Danger! We are off course!”
1) Daleks. Not robots, strictly speaking, but c’mon… “YOU! WILL! TURN! LEFT! YOU! WILL! OOHHHH-BAAAAAAY!”
And no, I didn’t forget HAL. There’s creepy funny, and then just creepy. You shouldn’t fear for your life every time the system can’t find a particular location.
