EU: Pronounced "Ewww."
Apr 16I was so damned excited as a pathetic nerd boy for last year’s Star Wars: Episode III that I actually did something I never thought I’d ever do again: I read Star Wars fiction.
Do Not Ingest Stylus
Apr 15I love cautionary stick figure signs and decoding what they’re really trying to say (don’t Jazzercise on the subway! Watch out for stars coming out of your head when the vending machine falls on you!).
So naturally, I just spent a good 20 minutes howling over this Nintendo DS Lite and Japanese Manual Mini Review.
Look at the GIANT DS falling on the baby! The octopus! The pissed-off snowman!
WikiWikiWhack: Nintendo DS Lite
Shit I Don’t Get…
Apr 14…about Infinite Crisis.
1) This is basically a blowjob to the original Crisis, right? And to all the fanboys who love their multiverse and the Silver Age? Written and orchestrated by a cabal of slavish devotees to the Silver Age?
Then why is every character from the pre-Crisis and Crisis era such an asshole? Alex Luthor, Superboy Prime, Superman of Earth-2–they’re pricks, to a man.
2) What the hell do these people have against the Giffen/DeMatteis era Justice League? Blue Beetle gets his brains shot out, Maxwell Lord becomes a malevolent bastard, Fire gets bitchy (and soon will become a throat-slitting secret agent, in Greg Rucka’s Checkmate series), Booster Gold’s written as a moron. I half expect G’nort to be the manipulating force pulling Alex Luthor’s strings, and that he’ll reveal himself by taking a steamy dump on Oberon’s forehead.
3) A one-shot? Four lead-up miniseries? A seven-issue main series, an assload of crossovers, and four one-shot specials to follow up on the lead-up miniseries? Necessary? Really?
WikiWikiWhack: Infinite Crisis, Multiverse (DC Comics), G’nort
All the world is waiting for her.
Apr 14I think I’ve found our Wonder Woman.
Her name is Missy Peregrym. Her credits are thin. Some minor TV work, including a role on the short-lived ABC series Life As We Know It. She’s in that silly gymnastics movie due out later this month.
And she’s Wonder Woman.
Mickey Hates Downloaders.
Apr 13While we’re on the subject of the paranoid folk at Disney, it should shock maybe a few that the corporate monolith soon to consume the souls of every living being on the planet (and I LIKE Disney) hates illegal downloading.
So much so, in fact, that they used the occasion of a random episode of their series The Proud Family to send a “Stealing music is BAD!” message to all the impressionable kids out there. See, there’s this program called EZ Jackster (ooh, clever!) and kids use it to get music, but it’s free, but it’s stealing, and blah blah blah. The evil kid who turns the good kid onto the program even has a line like, “I know you are afraid I am trying to show you a world without rules.” To which the good kid of course replies, “Yes I AM! Kids need rules. And rich music artists like Metallica need more cash to wipe their ass with.”
I can only assume that this went into production during Eisner’s reign of terror, and that Bob Iger wouldn’t be caught dead sending such a message, since he’s betting the farm that today’s kids want to buy his shit off iTunes.
WikiWikiWhack: The Walt Disney Company, Robert Iger
